Why am I doing this?
Sometimes, out of the blue, there comes a thought that goes something like this: “Why on Earth are you doing this to yourself? Wouldn’t it be much easier for everyone to maybe just get MSc in organizational psychology, get a corporate job in HR or marketing, leave children to their own devices and just live 9-5 with 5 weeks paid leave every year?” Lately, I had quite a lot of time to think and the answer is yes, it would make my life much easier in many ways, but…
There is clearly something that drives me in a different direction and I was wondering what it is, and why I find it so important to pursue a different path. Two things came to mind. One is a concept of “delayed life” in the sense that sometimes, we just live under circumstances that are less than ideal for us hoping that one day (when I retire/when I have holidays/when children grow up etc.) we will eventually get to live the life we always wanted. Well, I’m done with delayed life, I have limited time on this Earth and I’m not going to spend it living what someone else wants me to.
The other aspect is the societal narratives and structures that nudge us to a certain behaviour (oh my, waaayyy too much social psychology in one sentence) compliant with ideological images that I can’t stand for. My purpose in this existence seems to be to find a sustainable alternative to the omnipresent neoliberal principles and carve a bit of life that is not driven by individualism, growth, optimisation and accumulation of capital (for someone else) but rather by contentment, joy and community. I’m very much aware that this is not achievable in its entirety since none of us is an isolated individual (an idea that neoliberalism promotes) and we all act and exist within structures and social groups that powerfully influence not only our lifestyle but also a way of thinking and the limitations and opportunities that are given to us at this very moment. My mission is to explore how far one can go within the limits given to us while not compromising on certain values. I hope it makes sense.
I’m not saying I will never ever get a corporate job, who knows what will happen in a year or ten, but it just doesn’t feel right at the moment. Is it even possible or doable what I’m trying to do here? I do not know. But it seems important to try!
Well, that’s me on the mission. Do you have any thoughts? Please, share :-)
Ready to clean and set stones. I wonder how they will look when finished…