Three of those days
You know when you have “one of those days” when nothing really goes according to plan, your work is slow, maybe filled with distractions, you keep making mistakes and just simply nothing goes well? So that’s my last three days in a nutshell. On Monday, I wanted to create a very simple stone setting that we will be making in the next workshop. I expected it to take 20 - 30 minutes from start to finish. A simple job, a bit of cutting, soldering, clean up and set. I’ve done it many times before, and I can do it again. Plenty of time left in the day to move on to more challenging jobs. Except…
It is Thursday now and I’m still not finished. I have started, ruined and started again four settings like this and when I’m finished writing this blog post, I’m going to attempt it for the fifth time. Yesterday, I was in a state of mind where I was even doubting I could ever make any piece of jewellery ever, maybe it was all just a dream! (that's your self-gaslighting lesson there) Everything that could go wrong went wrong and more. I’m still slightly baffled why it didn’t work. I’m inclined to accept the hypotheses that someone cursed me or the piece I’m making. A rational explanation I can’t find any. I’m not sure if I feel more frustrated or amused by the whole situation, but please, keep in mind, I’m laughing when writing this. We all have mysteriously bad days sometimes. It is part of the process.
Another thing that I wanted to share with you is a little bit less funny, but I think if you are still here, you deserve an explanation. Since early 2017 (when I had an awful lot of exciting plans, my online sales were going well and a new jewellery collection was on the way) I have been in a situation where a close person to me has been periodically creating - from my point of view - unnecessary drama where at times I had to drop everything in a second and stop the metaphorical fire before it got even worse. Then recover and return back to normal life. This led to a lot of missed opportunities, and many times I had to apologise and step away from projects I’d loved to be part of, it also led to massive gaps in my making practice and online presence.
Since November last year, there was unprecedented silence and I could finally relax and start focusing on creative work. Which has been absolutely fantastic, and I realised that now I was finally ready to heal. I also believe I have the resources to fully focus on my jewellery making and finally get it done, even though it is six years delayed. So hopefully no more dropouts and from now on I will be consistently building up what I set myself to do.
Except for “the three of those days”, lol.
A pink Buddha and pebble dash… That’s pretty much how I feel at the moment :-D